I am officially overwhelmed by life. The wave of things happening has finally washed over me and caused me to breathe it all in. There’s nothing left to do but ride.
Yesterday I launched One, a new online magazine. That was a big deal and I did it on very little sleep. Same day, my daughter came down with some freaky fever that wouldn’t go away. She had no appetite and only wanted to sleep, even as she would insist in her semi-wakeful moments that she really wanted to go outside. She would get half-dressed and then collapse on the bed asleep again for another two hours. This happened repeatedly. Also it was a Bahá’í holiday, so we didn’t go to work or school in observance of the event, but everyone else did, which tends to make things feel a little eerie and quiet for us. Plus the weather was weird. All dark and cloudy and moody but no rain until late at night when I didn’t expect it. And I had forgotten about the laundry hanging on the line in the yard, so that all got soaked, folded and sitting in a basket. Hate when that happens. But what can I do? Bring it in and stick it in the dryer.
Today we all overslept when ordinarily—on weekends—the kids are up at 6:00 am no matter what time we put them to bed. Of all days, today they oversleep. The early-riser, Paolo, practically refused to get out of bed. He was grumpy all morning. He had power-struggles with me over every little step of getting ready to go to school, right up to dropping him off and refusing to go inside. That wasn’t fun. It’s not easy for either of us that Council had to stay home today.
Of course, here at home, Council is bopping and jumping all over the house like a perky little flower ready for a sunny day. (The sunny day is not here, however.) She has her sense of humor back, and she’s dressed in a cheerful patchwork skirt and pink shirt that brings out the flush that has returned to her cheeks. She acts like nothing happened yesterday.
“Mama, I’m hungry!” she says to me. “Can we go to McDonald’s?” Meanwhile I haven’t showered in days, we’ve been eating only take-out while we worked on One all weekend, and I can’t remember what time it is. Or what day it is. Isn’t McDonald’s bad for you when you are recovering from some weird fever? No McDonald’s. “Can I have some noodles?” No, we’re out of noodles. Go away. Go back to sleeping.
This morning I told River I need a vacation in my own house. I need everyone to leave, no obligations. I want a personal chef to deliver my meals for a week. This is not likely to happen.